Creative People doing their thing

I've previously posted about how the adult world seems to systematically break creativity out of us while I personally try to keep it more front and centre with my box of crayons.

I think this is definately a skill I can improve on even more, especially when I find special "blogs of note" like Found In Pockets and People Reading. And for something a little different (and lesser known), try Questionable Me.

They are fabulous examples of people who have the gumption to do something different and then get noticed (positively) for it. Plus, they are also fabulous examples of living in the moment. I ask again, how do you live your life?

Changing Perspectives

Sometimes we need to twist our necks around in order to see something that might have always been under our noses. Or we need someone else who's already looking at it from a different angle. I suppose that's why we ask others for their opinion.

More grumpiness

It must be cultural or something. I really don't understand why some people only look at the negative side of things.

Here's an example. The discussion was regarding selling the existing home, and buying a condominium. There are many valid reasons for considering this move, and this has been discussed by the couple for well over 10 years already. In the past 10 years, I continue to hear excuses about why the move hasn't happened yet, however, I can tell in the discussion, they really are moving further along in the process. For instance, I've been part of discussions regarding painting their current home. (For background, I've painted 2 full houses top to bottom in less time than they've spent discussing their potential move.) What I heard them say was that painting was difficult and would be hard for them to do. This would be (I believe) the 3rd time I've offered to paint their house (for free). My only rule is that they can not be in the house when I am painting. They move as much as they can, and leave the rest, and I will take care of it.

Doesn't that sound like a very reasonable proposition? Especially if you've seen my painting skills - pretty darn good quality at that price (and fast too!). But alas, they are not sold. Somehow even after I gave them the best offer I could (I go buy the paint for you, I move the furniture for you, I provide the stuff to paint with, I clean up for you, - I take all the hassles out and all you have to do is pay for the paint and they're still not convinced. Do they realize it doesn't get any better than this, if they seriously want their home painted? This is what I heard next: "you know, it's really hard to sell and buy a home - if you sell first, and then can't find one to buy, you're screwed. If you buy first, and then can't sell yours, you're screwed again. Maybe we shouldn't even move."

Please help me understand people like this. What do they really want? To just find excuses to complain about something?!!

If you're wondering - of course it's family.

Creative Writing

Last night I did some searching through blogs for some keywords and I was stunned by the sheer volume of quality writing by so many people!

What struck me was how many creative writers there are out there who are able to weave incredible poems and stories in ways that would be impossible for me. Yet - is it really impossible? Alas, of course I can not give up quite that easily. I will have to make an attempt at writing some short piece of fiction just to see and should I fail to post something here then you'll know that it was far more difficult than I anticipated. That, or I just got really lazy or busy.

P.S. - Click here for a great one!

Not for Grumpy People

Some people are so miserable and grumpy, I wonder if they know how to smile. Every opportunity you give them, turns into excuses for why something won't work. I'm not sure if it's a cultural thing (though I'm sure that has some impact) but I wonder if they've ever been exposed to the other side of the coin.

I started to wonder why I even feel so passionately about grumpy people. Why do I care what they think. I mean, they exist, they live their lives and who am I to judge or make comment on how they choose to live their lives? If they want to be grumpy - let them, right?! If I dissect this further, I realize what has changed in me internally - I used to be grumpier, and I see the light now.

I used to think of it as "the glass is half empty but it means we can easily fill it up with more". I guess I always used to see additional opportunities when it looked a bit tough. Now, I realize there is even another way - "the glass is half full AND we can easily fill it up with more".

I am amazed at the impact this attitude has on everyone around me. Not only am I happier, everyone around me is happier! The facts have not changed, yet we all seem to be having more fun trying to fill the glass! With this change, I now want to share this secret even with the grumpy people.

I realize though that some people are absolutely satisfied in their grumpiness and that won't change until they decide they're ready to change. Sometimes, I need to keep my passion in check and make sure I don't waste too much time on the grumpy.

This blog is not for the grumpy. It's for those who are already open and ready - let's share the secret and pass it along.

Deja Vu

Someone I know absolutely believes in destiny. What is surprising about him, is that you would think he's the last person in the world to believe this. He takes control of his life and conquers everything he sets his mind to. He's very much a 'driver' behind the wheels of his life.

So, when he tells me that he believes, of course I have to ask.

Daisy says... So, if your destiny was to find treasure worth 50 million dollars, why would you even go looking for it, when it will happen anyway?

He says... I don't know what my destiny is. I don't know if it is to find or not find that treasure. If I stop looking, it is for a reason. If I start looking, it is for a reason, and that was meant to happen. The only part that is missing, is I don't know what is meant to happen.

Daisy says... Why do you believe?

He says... Have you ever had deja vu? I've had it a few times and everytime, it is amazing how clear it is, and I realize as it is happening that either this has happened before, or I know exactly what is going to happen next. I know exactly what path I am supposed to take next. It is as if something is guiding me accurately to wherever I am supposed to go.

Daisy says... I have and each time, I swear it is a scene that is not only familiar, but incredibly clear and accurate. You're right. I know what will happen next, and I know what decision or path I should take. I'm only redoing the scene again.

Many of us experience deja vu - it's strange and scary because we have no idea what it means. We can't begin to understand it, and that scares us. It is particularly disconcerting for those of us who believe we take control of our own lives and make things happen in our lives. Yet, I love his answer - it's simple. Of course. It makes sense.

Thanks buddy. I'll continue on my way, because I feel it in my gut, and because it's my destiny.

Enlightenment

I was having a debate with someone yesterday and I guess I feel so strongly about this, that I have to put it down in black and white. And just because I feel strongly about it today, does not mean my opinion may not change tomorrow if you introduce new information for me.

Be forewarned. You may disagree.

Her belief is that ignorant people should be enlightened. We should do a better job of telling people in other societies, communities and cultures about our ways. Let me use a specific example. We should tell others that women are treated as equals and not inferior to men.

(I'm going to get flack for this, I can tell. Here goes.)

I know that as a woman living in Canada, I enjoy freedoms and rights that I think are rightfully mine to enjoy. In fact, I think we still have some more ways to go to attempt to reach the equality balance. Having said that, I do not agree that everyone needs to be aware of this.

What I mean is that if you're from a culture where women are not seen as equals, I do not see it as my job (or anyone else's for that matter) to enlighten all the women of this culture that they should not accept this inequity. By 'enlightening' them, it is imposing our belief system on another group, and who is to judge on which system is better, or even the right one? Someone even referred to Star Trek - one of their rules is to not change the species/people they meet by imposing Star Trek beliefs. It is true. We do not know of who they are, and what they value, and why it is the way it is - who are we to judge another culture/group of people?

I can certainly judge what I know of it and say "wow, that sucks, and I would never be happy there", however, I can not continue drawing a line to say, "wow, that sucks, and no women would or should ever be happy there". We assume that we know better because we live differently. I am sure that there are people (including women) who are satisifed with the life they live in these cultures. Morever, some of them, may even not appreciate getting the information. Some people don't know what to do, or feel that there is nothing they can do.

Now that you think I'm crazy, here's what else I believe.

Some people, in any society, questions things. They are the ones who seek out to be enlightened. They want to understand the world beyond their own group. Information is available for those seeking it and though it may not always be easy, I think for those who have a will, there is a way. I believe that information needs to be relayed internally. It is not from outsiders (like us judging others), but from insiders who live and breathe it every day. They are the ones who are better able to understand their world, and therefore, the additional information the outside world can provide. There are always the early adopters in any society who seek, find and begin to make change. I think we need to let them find whatever information they need. Our only job is to make the information available.

The Freedom of Insanity

I read another book. It talks of insanity and the freedom that this label gives the person.

The proposition is that when you are labeled crazy, you can do whatever you want and no one will think much of it because, afterall, you're already crazy - you're not rational. Of course you would do nutty things.

I love this idea. I know some people think that at times, I have my moments that are "out there". What justifies my ability to say or do these things is honestly, caring less about what other people think. It's about letting go of the status quo, and what 'normal' people do in the situation, and what 'normal' businesses would do. It is about getting creative. In that process of getting creative, some outlandish ideas may appear but once in a while, we may find a golden nugget, and is that golden nugget not worth the effort?

We seem to be so risk-averse that everything we do needs the approval of our friends, family and society at large. I'd like to think I take into consideration what they think and then make my own decision. I know I've made decisions that others have challenged and come out on the winning end in spite of the obstacles. I've also made decisions that have not been as successful. I don't take these as failures, but learning experiences, and for every success, most people have lots of other attempts. Success is not necessarily 'hard' - I think it just takes perserverance.

Sometimes, we give too much power to our friends and family and think they may know us better. You know yourself better than anyone else. Take a tip from the crazy and have the freedom to think and be and do, while not worrying what others might think. Besides, crazy is just another way to label unique. Be unique. Be yourself.

Misguided Reflections

I hear funny comments on a regular basis. Since I'm a fitness instructor, the participants in my class tend to ask me questions related to fitness and a very common one is "how do you stay so thin?".

In fact, someone asked me that today. Instead of my usual answer, I laughed and replied "it's not like you're a cow you know". I can not imagine anyone in their right mind would consider this person 'big' and yet this question asked so many times by young women with great bodies reflects an internal struggle and a body-image perception of not-good-enough.

You can blame external factors like magazines and television, but the reality is, we control our own perceptions. We need to start loving our bodies, ourselves just the way we are. This does not take away that we may want to improve ourselves, but we need to be realistic on what's achievable for us individually.

What's funnier still is that for many of us, we are simply unable to accept and love ourselves, until someone else starts to love us first. We seem to be our own harshest critics focusing on the parts we dislike the most. Other people don't focus on these parts, so why should you?

Begin to love your favourite body part - is it your eyes? Your hair? Your fingers? Whatever it is, start with your favourite and go from there. You'll soon find that along with a health and fitness routine, you'll begin to love more and more parts.

Feeling Alive

Emotional roller coasters have many feelings mixed in. From happiness, to anger and sadness to everything in between, they allow us to pinch and tell ourselves that we are alive.

I want to live every day with such life and adventure that if it turns out to be my last, then I will have no regrets. I want to have many intense and fabulous memories that I will have a hard time remembering which memory was the best because the truth is - they were all memorable for different reasons. And even if there are memories with equal deep contrast of sadness and hurt, I want to remember them for what they taught me.

Someone (whether you believe that to be God or my mother) gave me a body and a mind and I do not intend to waste it. I will not wonder what might have been and I will live life to the best of my ability. Afterall, how many chances do I really have at living it to the fullest? This is my chance. I'm not going to blow it.

You decide how you want to live yours.

Music to study by

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gu4R0OX4Flo

I have heard this song at least 50 times in the last few days/weeks. I keep replaying it over and over again as I've been trying to study and I haven't bored of it yet. In fact, I wish I could put it on repeat.

Music helps me stay in the moment. It somehow helps me concentrate better on things like semitendonosis though I don't understand why. It's as if while I study, I need to engage additional senses to help me memorize. However, this song is not so distracting, that instead of learning, I'm just listening to the song. Call it background music (but far more than that).

As I wrote my exam earlier today and spilled out my brain with those silly facts and figures that I will never remember again, I think I almost heard this song somewhere in my subconscious.

I'm thrilled to now have the exam past, and be able to listen again to this song, though louder and I feel it surrounding me. It takes me to a peaceful place where all I'm required to do is simply be. All I need now is a coffee to savour, and I'm good.

Are you at peace?

Memories are made of feelings

They say that the things you remember are the events and moments with vivid, strong emotions attached. Okay, I'm going to be black and white here - these vivid emotions tend to be either extremely positive or negative. For instance, many people remember assassinations, 9/11 etc. They also remember weddings, births, graduation, etc. In fact, the list goes on and on.

However, I'll take it one step further to say that I think it's not only the vivid, big, over-the-top memories that stick, but also the smaller ones. They add up!

I believe we need to ensure we have an incredibly rich store of positive memories to draw upon and remember, or else we might think on our deathbeds that we did not enjoy our lives. And that would be such a shame. I think if we begin with all the smaller positive memories, when the big ones come along, they become that much more important, that much more vivid, and then that much more memorable.

I will start small - we all have to start somewhere. I need to savour at least 1 positive memory every single day. By making that conscious decision to savour and relive something that day, it helps me remind and reward myself with positive feelings that seem to flow into the following day. And there are lots of positive things that happen every day if you are open to seeing them.

I did not have a bad day today. However, it started a little different from most Saturdays. Today we had a snowstorm and when I got to the fitness class I teach, I started with about 5 people. I was getting ready to start, and one of the 5 people said, "Don't worry, I'm sure more people will come" and I said, "I'm not worried. No matter how many people show up, we're going to have a good time, just the few of us." 23 more people showed up. Now, 28 is much fewer than the typical 40+ Saturday class, however for a snowstorm class, I was pretty happy. Plus, at the end, a new participant said to me, "That was INCREDIBLE! I really enjoyed that!"

Bingo. Positive memory. Happy pat on the back. And it's only 10:30am. I wonder how many more positive things will happen over the course of the day!

Remember to savour your memories and make more positive ones. I can't think of a better way to be rich, than to be rich with happiness.

Finding excuses

It amazes me. I'm finding any and all excuses not to study. If only I could use this energy and actually use it to study with, then I'd be in good shape.

Alas, here I am, and I might as well explain myself.

I don't want to study because the material I'm studying is not important to me. I don't want to say the material is not important, because obviously, it's important to some people, and it's a requirement that I take this course/exam. However, from my point of view, the material I'm memorizing is not important to me. Add to the fact that I have not taken an exam in 15 years. And I didn't enjoy school when I had to go?

Hmmm. That sounds like a recipe for delay tactics.

I'm trying to memorize a bunch of numbers, and names. Think latin names and you'll get the picture. I have always enjoyed understanding how things work, but straight memorization just doesn't appeal to me because I've always had trouble with it (read: weakness). So what can I do? I have no choice but to try and memorize this stuff, but it sure as heck isn't fun.

This reminds me of my previous post and why it is so important to do the things you love. Otherwise, you'll always be finding excuses not to do what you're supposed to be doing (like I am now).

Here's a good one.... one of the hamstring muscles is called "Semitendinosus". I now remember that as "Semi-Tend-To-Know-This".

Here's another one... ATP, Fast G, Slow G, Fat - 1, 2, 38, 100 - 1-10, 10-2, 2+ x2
Nevermind... I think you see my pain now...

How do you live your life?

Like many of us, do you feel like you're running from one task to another with no time for anything else in between? Do you feel extremely busy and find the phrase "I don't have any time for..." has already become a staple?

I don't imagine life gets any less busy. It's how we perceive it. If we begin to spend more time on the things that really count - the things that you really want to do, we magically find that being busy seems to lose it's significance. When we're doing what we already love to do, we would never describe that as "busy" with a shrug of our shoulders, would we?

When we're in the moment, time slows almost to a standstill - we see, hear, and feel all the emotions. The moment could be as simple as going to a basketball game, and being dazzled by the experience. We watch with our eyes, everything from the players, to the coaches, to the fans. We listen to the sounds of the shoes squeaking, the fans cheering, the hushed silence before an important play. We feel our heartbeat. We get onto our feet to engage in a wave through the stadium. We've forgotten everything else - we are not thinking about issues at work, home, school - we're focusing on a game, and we're enjoying that moment to the fullest.

When was the last time you were in the moment and how can you be present more often? How can you turn every day moments into something more?

I'll share a really quick one for you. I don't always do this, but when I remember, it feels incredible. After I've paid for my coffee, my first taste is savoured. I am not walking, I am not talking. I'm not focusing on anything except the first sip. Quite literally, my world stops for a few seconds as I appreciate the aroma and taste.

We all need to find more moments to enjoy.